As long as you keep trying to fit yourself into places you don't belong you will feel like you aren't good enough.
I saw a posting for a job the other day. It was a job I’d been fired from a while ago, something I now know was actually a re-direct to the life I was meant to be living. At the time when it happened though, I remember feeling awful. I felt like there was something wrong with me, some flaw that made me not as good as other people.
When someone doesn’t want us, it’s really easy to think that the problem is us.
Whether it’s a job loss, a relationship ending, or feeling unwelcome in your old group of friends, it’s easy to feel rejected and insecure.
Your mind starts wondering about what you did wrong.
How you could be different.
What you need to change.
Why other people can do it and you can’t.
How you aren’t as good as other people.
That isn’t the reason.
The only reason someone doesn’t want you is because it wasn’t a fit. You were a square peg and it was a round hole. Or you were a round peg and it was a square hole.
It’s NEVER EVER EVER because there is something wrong with you.
Whoever you are – someone is going to want that. The right person will want that. You don’t have to give up what you want, or change who you are, in order for someone to want you. You just have to wait for the right fit.
Reading through the job posting – that job was meant for someone else. The person that I am today wouldn’t have applied on it. Not because it’s a bad job, but because it really isn’t a fit for who I am. The vibe of the posting, the skills they wanted, what they expected, none of it fit.
Loving ourselves it getting to know if we are a round peg or a square peg, and finding places that we fit and flourish.
To being the you that you want to be,
P.S. The secret to not feeling rejected when someone doesn’t want you is to want yourself. You need to know that you’re amazing and perfect how you are, so that the next time someone else doesn’t want you, you think “I’m awesome! How could they not want this?!” instead of thinking that you should change. I teach women how to do this though one on one coaching.