It’s so easy to get caught up in where I “should” be. I should be making more money. I should be in better shape. I should spend more quality time with my son. I should have a steady boyfriend.
But I’m not. And I don’t. I’m exactly where I am right now.
That doesn’t mean I can’t want more. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to work out and get stronger and faster. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to set some time aside each week to do something with my son. That does mean I don’t want to be dating.
But expecting myself to be something I’m not right now feels terrible.
It feels like struggling through a workout because I think I should be lifting more or moving faster than I can.
If feels like guilt because I am working instead of spending time with my son.
If feels like frustration because I can’t possibly, in this moment, be something that I’m not.
Whenever we are using the word “should,” we are fighting with reality. We never win when we are fighting against reality; we just end up feeling bad.
You are exactly where you are today. That’s perfectly okay. Telling yourself that you "should" be something that you aren't isn't going to get you to where you want to be any faster.